Well, I've noticed that I've been changing. Mostly it's some old bad habits that used to cause me more harm than good. Just little emotional things, and ways to handle my issues. So far, I feel like I'm headed in the right direction.

I'm planning a trip back up to RI for a week in April. Let's see how this works out.

I've lined up my hawk again. He he he. Tomorrow I spike it up! I'm excited about this.

I have no idea what to write. I need to start writing more, it's good for me. It's the best release for me.

Otep is right...art saves.

-Lu

P.S. That isn't my real mood. The little emoticon thing made me laugh so I had to put it up there!

So, Dave and I have been in Asheville for just over 3 months now. We still haven't really left the house much. Of course, the last two months have been snowy and cold, which is unusual for this area.

I think we plan to be out and about tomorrow. We want to go out for a "date" type thing. Just the two of us, maybe a nice lunch somewhere and then either hiking or wandering around "downtown".

I know Dave wants to find some nice coffee houses. He wants to find at least one that has poetry readings. Open mic poetry...interesting. I know he'll want me to read some of my poetry, but I'm not sure if I can. I just don't know if I have the balls to stand up in a coffee shop and read my life aloud to others. But that's all good I guess. I've told him before that if he wants to read my poetry he's more than welcome to do so. I have a feeling he'll try to get me to do it myself.

My room mates drive me nuts, and not in the good way.

I've been having some issues lately. Things that are pretty much out of my control. Well, I have been trying to remedy the situation, but it's very slow going. It's my sexuality. I've already figured out that I'm not straight, and I'm not Bi. I'll admit it here that I truly hate men. Somehow though, I love the man I'm with. Yeah, he drives me nuts at times too, but everyone does at some point. It hurts though. It's strange, but it feels like I'm denying myself what I want and what I seem to need. I cry about it when no one's around, and it seems like no one truly understands. The one person I've known that did understand is long gone, and I didn't find out until years after he died. I can only imagine how much pain he'd been in, and I know what mine feels like. This whole thing is really confusing for me, and sometimes it really feels like just I can't take it anymore.

Alright. Last week really was Hell Week at work. I barely went online at all, just out of exhaustion. I ended up picking up even more shifts than I was originally scheduled for. BUT IT'S ALL GOOD! This will be one super sweet paycheck! I got about 50 hours last week, so that paycheck will be very nice.

So, what else is new? Honestly I'm not sure. I'm still trying to find more inspiration to write. Not too sure how that's going. I might just let Lu start writing stories again. He seems to have more inspiration lately. He's been thinking a lot, and coming out more frequently again. I know why he's been coming out. He feels a threat, and he's gotta be MR. PROTECTOR! It's all good though, I do appreciate his help. I just wish he would cheer up a bit sometimes...lol. Well...that's Lu.

I've become entangled into Manga and Anime now that I have internet. This is so exciting! I love it. It's a great release and it's just fun. I get so entangled in the stories I spend about 90% of my free time entangled in it.

I can't wait for the weather to warm up a bit. FOR HIKING! I want to play in the woods. Go searching around, finding fun. Plus, the woods are the best spot for me to play. I can be anyone and do anything in the woods.

Alright. So, whatever it's almost Christmas.

Most people are still scurrying around buying gifts and running to and fro to make sure Christmas will be perfect. Personally, I'm trying not to crash and burn at work. I'm not much of a Christmas person. I'm starting to hate it less now that I've moved. Sounds weird, but Christmas is finally able to become just another day for me. (Score One Team Lucius!) This is HELL WEEK at least for me. But, I have a good easy schedule for some of it. HAH! Monday and Thursday mornings I'm working an easy station. I like it. I get to set my own pace and tell the waitstaff to go away. I kind of enjoy that little power I'm given. :: But, yeah, Thursday night...Christmas Eve...mmm...THAT one is gonna hurt Team Lucius. Mmmm...double on Christmas Eve...it's gonna be a rough day folks!

Other than that...I'm good. I have no idea how to make friends down here, but that's nothing new. Eh...I'm a hermit...hermits stay inside and away from people too much to make friends. BUT...at least I do get out to go to work. So I guess it's not all that bad.

Anyways! I have no idea. I can bitch and moan about what didn't go perfectly at work, but I don't care enough about it anymore. I'm just glad it's over and done with. Tomorrow's another day.

OH! I THOUGHT OF SOMETHING! Here's what I'm happy about, as far as working a morning/day. I GET THE AFTERNOON TO MYSELF! YES! SCORE ONE TEAM LUCIUS! (That makes the score: 2 Team Lucius!) YAY! I get to clean and do housework with no one else around! That means it's gonna be dancing time too! YES!

Alright, I gotta get to bed soon...it's almost midnight and I have to be up around 7! ACK!

Oh, I got fuzzy boot-e type slippers yesterday. SO COMFY AND WARM! <3 for my super awesome fuzzy boot-e slippers!

Alrighty then. Let's start with a little bit of background info here. Where I'm living...it doesn't snow much. Seriously, these people can't handle rain, snow is like something from another planet. And plows...yeah...they don't really exist here either.

ON THE BRIGHT SIDE! SNOW DAY! SNOW DAY! SNOW DAY! I'm not even a little child anymore, but DAMN do I love a good snow day. It's supposed to snow for three days. That means town might not be available for three days. Seriously...this town + snow = EVERYONE GO HOME! It's hilarious to me. Hell, I love the snow, I'll brave snow all day. It's just driving in it that I don't like. But damn this is funny. A few inches and they really do think it's a friggin blizzard. THIS IS SO FUNNY! Sure, it's good snow. That perfect kind you can just grab a handful and it's an instant snow ball! HELL YEAH DUDE! SNOW DAY! I already had a snow fight earlier, it was only about 5 minutes, but it was fun. One of my room mates and I were just huckin' snow balls at each other for a few minutes. It was a blast. I love snow ball fights.

Mmmm. The snow makes me yearn for an adventure. There's just something about walking around in the woods while it's snowing. The beauty of it. It just pulls at me. Right from my heart chakra area. This strong pulling, for fun, for adventure. I just want to grab my coat, throw on my boots, and go for a run in the trees!!!!!!! But, it's getting dark out, and Man Beast is almost home (^_^). I've got a feeling it would be better to wait on that one.

I have a feeling we'll lose power tonight. That WILL suck. Yes...yes it will. Because no power means...NO HEAT! No hot water. And probably the worst (at least for me) is NO VIDEO GAMES! ACK! HAHAHAHAHAHA!

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(about an hour later)
So...fuck being happy today. Just fuck it.